Tears

Tonight I am crying, once again,
like an infant
I am crying for my Mommy
to take away the hurt
inflicted by yet another playground bully
But Mom is gone
forever
and I must dry my own tears.

He Done Is Him

He done
~ with family
~ with me
~ with work on the hard stuff
~ with promises
~ with the boring
~ with the mundane
~ with all things real

Now
~ fast cars
~ lean horses
~ hot women
~ no commitments
~ playtime, all the time
~ things, things, things
Is Him

He-don-is-m: Hedonism is the philosophy that pleasure is the most important pursuit

Urge

The urge comes again

to run

to leave

to hide

to erase what has become



I lay down

close my eyes

and

find the reason

and strength

to stay.

Definition

You are there
in Wikipedia
writ LARGE
by society's collective wisdom

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mid-life_crisis#Characteristics

But do I believe the reality before me or
see it simply as a
way out
of an act
you are now tired of playing.

Perhaps the answer is more
clearly

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/15/health/15mind.html

Closing Night

The auditions have begun
for my replacement
one by one
the parade of candidates
their auras awash in
pheromones
and fragrance
legs long and lean
hair that moves like silken waves
in the sun
curves of hip and thigh
unmarred by age and life
to rouse what I no longer can

I slink quietly to the side
and fade into the twilight
old, used and worn out
and I wonder
am I recycleable?

Could I be retouched
like the photographs
in the pin up
magazines - - -
Repackaged like an old
product
for a new market - - -
Made unreal in an attempt
to once more find something
real?

Do not erase

the Beauty of you
the rough edges and scars
make you the unique work of
Art and Love
that fills my dreams
three dimensional warmth
soft and hard
dark and light
One in Five Billion
just the way you are

Trust

I have lost trust
in so much
I took for granted
- love
- promises
- myself

I fall waiting for the bottom
but
there is no landing
hard or soft
there is only space
where Trust
used to be.